My whole life, up to fairly recently I was taught, like so many others that we can either be smart OR sexy. And that sucks. It sucks because it is not true and it sucks because all it does is to force you to choose and at least for me being smart has always been the "better way" according to society, because then at least I can make my own money and take care of myself. So why is that really something bad?
First of all it does not allow us to be all of ourselves at the same time. It simply just allows us to express bits and pieces of who we really are. In the long run this both boring for ourselves and for others but it is also kind of exhausting to keep parts of ourselves on lock down. Then after a while we might even forget these parts even existed, and honestly we might not even know they ever existed. As I see it it is such a waste and I also do think it plays a part in us being unhappy.
Secondly, in our sexiness lies a big part of our life force energy. By believing that we can just be either smart or sexy and choosing to be smart, we not only hide our beautiful sexiness and sexuality, we actually also hide part of our smartness (unconsciously that is of course). With parts of our life force energy pushed away and suppressed we can't fully access and express the parts that we do allow to be seen. When we suppress parts of our sexiness and only allow our smartness we can't really access and express all our smartness either. At least I can't.
It took me about 30 years to realize that I had been suppressing parts of my sexiness and parts of my sexuality for most of my life. Thank you Sandra for teaching me The Art of Living a Turned on Life (ps. I recommend every woman out there to join her life changing program). Then it took me some more time to realize that one big reason I have been suppressing it is because all I ever wanted was to be seen as smart, simply to fit in, and I thought I couldn't be both smart and sexy. Then when I met my love, he and our relationship taught me I can be both and also that the sexier I am the smarter I become and vice versa.
What is your relationship to being smart and being sexy?